Family Ties

Bless up!

I am an only child. It was always just me and my parents, but I never felt short-changed or cheated out of anything. My parents made every effort to ensure that I was well-rounded, and interacted with my family, knew my family and all those things

[Side note: While their efforts did not quite materialize, and I am still unsociable (and run and hide when people come to the house), I will not fault them for trying. I’m sure they did their best, it was just the resource they had.]

Well, every parent have parents too.. so of course I have grandparents. I didn’t live in a very close geographical locate to either side, as a result I didn’t see either of them as often as I would have liked. But I enjoyed my visits with them.

However, in January 2005 my maternal grandmother died…. and I really really enjoyed visiting her. Our visits weren’t frequent, but when they happened she ALWAYS made me feel special. We talked to each other ever so often on the phone, but her warm hugs and glowing smile couldn’t be transmitted through TOJ (remember that name?) cables. However, when something happened, I ensured she was informed. Can’t have grandma being outta the loop now can we??

My grandmother was special!! And she received various accolades from different entities and persons expressing such. She was a sweet and warm person. Hardworking. Kind. Tender-hearted. Warm-hearted… and she loved to see others happy…. And she just the absolute sweetest…

Probably (or should I say definitely) the part of the visit I looked forward to the most was the part where she would go into a little back room and come out with goodies (and of course she had a smile [more like a grin this time] because she was absolutely delighted that I had a smile [or more of a big ‘ole grin] on mine). I can’t even begin to list ALL the stuff my grandmother has given me over the years, but they were always unique and can’t recall getting the same thing twice..unless it was food.

FOOD. My grandmother was a exceptional cook.

When we would visit, we would usually call ahead and ask about her plans, and then plan to surprise her with our visits. Luckily, we made regular calls, so our surprise were rarely spoilt.

But then my grandmother died, and while I have gotten to know my aunts and cousins from that side of the family a little better, I never visited the house again. Not until today. It was weird for me to be at the gate and not see my grandmother’s face in awe and surprise when we emerged from the car. And the smile that followed… PRICELESS.

What I would give to see that smile again…

And stepping in and seeing all the pictures of her still posted on the walls. And seeing the various plaques and certificates bearing her name.. It was a little to much. So I slept… and when I woke and barely peeked through, I saw a picture of her smiling (at me) and I felt at peace.. It would be the same smile she would give me had she been there and saw me sleeping.

I looked forward to living with my grandmother while going university (albeit UWI or UTech), I knew where I was going to stay. I (as well as my parent) also knew that if I stayed there, I would be properly fed.. Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner well prepared (and I probably wouldn’t have this MILO addiction now) and well presented just for me to partake.

But it was not to be.

Tragedy struck.

I am not sure of the details of the story. I never asked, some things are better left unknown. But I do recall them telling me about she being in the hospital for some eye treatment… but I don’t know. Nor do I wanna know. Knowing won’t bring her back.

I miss my grandmother.

*What she lacked in height she made up in love*

“Mama”

• Posted in: Reminisce
• Tagged: death, grandmother, life, lonely, love, missing